4/100

umiiyak muli ang kalangitan

sa nagkasala hatid ay kapatawaran

at isang oyayi sa bilasang kaisipan

mga luhang lumilingap

sa mga aninong naghihintay sa pagtubos

ng dalisay na liwanag

tulad nitong aking diwa

na sa huli lang napagtanto

na ang oras ay humihinto

na ang oras ay huwad

sa pusong natutunang umibig
 umaasa mang matumbasan

ay walang hinihintay na kapalit

3/100

in what ways do you speak, my dear

in what ways should I stand

for the sky above you

is same as mine

the lulling moon

the kindling sun

so hold my hand

cast my doubts, all my fears

 and guide my soul

towards the gates of the Empyrean

2/100

unti-unting inililigpit

ang limang taon

sa bawat pagtiklop

sa bawat pagsinop

ngunit ang iyong gunita

sa loob ng maikling panahon

ang siyang pawang

hindi natatapos

tulad nitong payapang gabi

1/100

 sa likod ng isang paalam

ay isang mapaganyayang ngiti

na ang bukas ay muling sisibol

upang ipagbunyi ang kahapong

nagbigay daan sa araw ngayon

100 Tula Para kay Beatrice

Isang ambisyosong proyekto na gumawa ng isang serye ng mga tula sa paggunita sa buhay (celebration of life), La Vita Nuova

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HzroxR1Xlw

And so today...

... I crossed the Rubicon.

I am no Julius Caesar and I have no legion in my command. But I have my parents, my siblings, and the merciful grace of God.

One day, I'll recount this day as the herald of either my victory or defeat in life. But there will be no regrets since I know I stood for what I believe. I already received a lot of messages and calls from my concerned relatives admonishing me for my decision. I have nothing for them but apologies from the bottom of my heart. I know the sacrifices they made to put me in the place where I am now. They could have chosen not to care. And for that I am forever grateful. However, I know myself more than anyone and I know I chose the right thing to do. And so I will fight for it.

Naawa lang ako sa mga magulang at mga kapatid ko na nadadamay pa sa sigalot na ito. Kung sana lang sa akin na lang ituon ang lahat ng galit.  

And that's the way the cookie crumbles

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4sRTg7ne8E

Just lessons?

Dark clouds overhead...

I remember the first time I made a big decision for myself and that was when I chose to shift courses from Engineering to the Social Sciences. It wasn't a very difficult choice but what made it cumbersome were my parents' and relatives' opinions on the whys and hows. But I knew I needed to stand firm since it was very clear to me that the very decision will affect my future. Until one night my parents called for me and talked to me about it and ending the discussion saying that they're there for me regardless of my choice. I cried silently that night. There were no regrets for me.

History repeated itself, and this time I chose to take my medical licensure exam by March of next year instead of taking this September. Being faced with the same problem, I want to stand firm with this decision. I'd rather bear the transient pain than be haunted forever by the what ifs. And so I'll cry silently to myself at night for the next 6 months.

My indecisiveness already cost me to lose a very dear person.

...and I left my umbrella at home.