Today I was David

I just wanted to end the day fast. 

I woke up with a bitter taste in my mouth and with a weary and heavy feeling. I already know that there's a very long day ahead of me. What transpired the night before was quite a hard pill to swallow. I just needed to get by and that's all I cared. Knowing that I have to keep myself away from my routine, I decided to get out of the house, stop by the church, then watch whatever movie is playing in the cinema. It didn't take me a lot of time to prepare for I already had my clothes, my shoes, and my sling bag prepared ahead. I was supposed to use them for a different trip which was, well, cancelled. 

I arrived at San Nicolas cathedral by about past 9AM. As expected, just a handful of people were there. From where I was sitting, I can still view a statue of Mary in a wheeled altar that was parked in an adjacent open ground. Perhaps it was used during the recent Holy Week procession. It was still a few hours before noon yet I can already feel the heat of the day, to the point that it was almost suffocating. I had a folding fan with me so I fanned away the hour or so that I was there. Before I left the church, I paid homage to a Marian grotto and lit what was supposed to be 3 candles. One of them accidentally fell in the wax pit which was my first laugh of the day. Minus point sa langit? Haha. 

So off to the movies for me. I walked my way to the nearby mall under the shelter of my umbrella. I came just in time as the doors of the mall opened. As I was heading to the cinema, I noticed a lot of kids all donned in complete school uniform with pink sashes across their chests. Apparently, it was their graduation ceremony and that it was being held in the theaters. Lo and behold... there were no scheduled films for viewing as the theater rooms were all reserved for the graduation rites. Somehow I thought that the universe must be conspiring against me. But I cannot go home yet and just sulk the time away. I decided to head to another mall, albeit farther from home. I really needed the change in routine. 

The other mall didn't fail me. There were four films on show: A Minecraft Movie (for kids), The Accountant 2 (action), The Legend of Ochi (fantasy), and Until Dawn (horror). I didn't want Minecraft and I wasn't in the mood for horror. I wasn't in the mood for any action film either, although on a normal day it would probably be my choice. I ended up picking The Legend of Ochi. Something that I can watch easy without much care to the plot, I thought. When I bought my ticket, I still had about an hour to spare so I had time for a snack. Out of my listlessness earlier when I woke up, I forgot to make myself a cup of coffee. So for snack, I had iced coffee and a boston donut. I think there's been a change of dough used by Dunkin since it's no longer the usual stuff. When it was almost time for the movie, I bought a small tub of fries to bring inside the theater. The saleslady/cook asked me for my name since it will take a while to prepare. From experience, it's always been tricky whenever I give my real name since people usually don't get it and I had to repeat myself or even spell out loud. That's why I made an official go to 'order name' which is 'Joshua'. But for some reason, I said "David po" to the saleslady. So today I was David. Haha, another laugh for the day. Actually, being 'David' was quite a save since just after my name, 'David', was called, the saleslady then called for a certain 'Joshua' haha. I guess that's a small win for the day. 

I didn't have the entire theater room all for myself. When I entered, there was a family of 5 with kids. The six of us got to endure the entirety of a so-so movie which I give a rating of 5.5/10. I was actually surprised to see Willem Dafoe in the film, but his presence alone was not enough to save the movie. To the movie's credit, there were scenes that were nice, especially the ones featuring nature.

Before going back home, I went to the store to buy bath soap and a bag of chips. I recently watched a clip of Lay's barbecue flavored chips and that had me craving. 

Now I am back home as I am typing this journal of sort. I'm not yet fully drained so I still need to tire myself and distract myself more. There's laundry and cleaning to do anyway. Plus may raket pa ako pala until midnight.

The wind is rising

 

Le vent se lève!… Il faut tenter de vivre!
L’air immense ouvre et referme mon livre,
La vague en poudre ose jaillir des rocs!
Envolez-vous, pages tout éblouies!
Rompez, vagues! Rompez d’eaux réjouies
Ce toit tranquille où picoraient des focs!

-Paul Valéry, Le cimetière marin

I've been going in circles deep in the woods

Only to find that I just need to close my eyes

Dalida - Le temps des fleurs (Official Lyric Video)

Everything happens for a reason...

 

...and the reason is a lifetime with you, kiddo.

Uso ngayon yung Ghibli AI generated images pero haha, bakit parang hindi na kailangan pa sa picture na ito. Actually, medyo hawig sa bata dun sa Grave of the Fireflies (1988).

1st RECORDING OF: Till There Was You (as ‘Till I Met You’) - Meredith Willson & Eileen Wilson (1950) - YouTube

17 years later and nothing has changed

 

Malignant Sickness

    The three philosophers Hobbes, Locke, and Rousseau agree that men are naturally free, equal, and independent. They believe that we are born free. But in what context are we really free? It is freedom that we can act freely to whatever way we choose. It is freedom that we are all equal and not enslaved by a single person or a group of people. It is freedom that we can speak freely and be able to express ourselves. We are free because we have the right to free will.
    

    In a practical sense, are we really free? Maybe not. A lot of babies nowadays are born with debts tied to their names. They inherit the long list of unpaid sums their parents weren’t able to pay because of the worsening condition of our society. There’s even a joke saying, ‘nasa tiyan palang ay may utang na’. Even worse, it is a continuous chain passed from generations to generations. Freedom isn’t free. It’s no joke after all.
    

    The philosophers also state that we aim for the preservation of our lives. Yes, it is true that we live and spend our lifetime to ensure our survival. Like Darwin puts it, ‘survival of the fittest’.
    

    But are we really aiming for the preservation of our lives? In today’s context, one might think twice. Can you imagine working really hard and exhausting yourself with that over time for hard cash? And to top it all, your earned money won’t even suffice your personal needs. I may be too radical but it’s just like killing yourself slowly. No wonder a lot of people are going abroad to the land of milk and honey in search for greener pastures. They may also be working really hard there and experiencing emotional distraught being away from their homeland but it’s worth it. They earn what they deserve. Nationalism may be questioned, but it is in the heart and we carry it wherever we go.
     

    What I cannot believe is that our government is discouraging such diasporas and finding ways to lessen these occurrences. Isn’t it to find a living a right of everybody? The government must first improve the condition of this country before imposing such laws.
     

    There is a need to share consent to have a legitimate government, according to Hobbes, Locke, and Rousseau.
     

    This is exemplified by the system of elections in our society. We as citizens have the right to vote for the leaders that we think are worthy of leading us to the betterment of our nation. But it is undeniable that fraudulent acts may interfere. The thirst for power is ever burning in the minds of corrupt individuals, they tend to do everything just to gain control. ‘The end justifies the means’, the end being power for self-interest and the means being the use of unjust and deceiving deeds.
     

    Lastly, according to the three philosophers, the social contract remedies the problems in the state of nature. 

     In our contemporary setting, is it really so? Or is it for the benefit of the few in authority? Let our present condition speak for itself.

-xcr 2008

Spring

 

After years of searching and craving, I finally found you my dear LALA. Pero bakit ang liit mo na (wristwatch to scale)? I'm glad that you still taste the same. Mas gusto talaga kita kesa sa chocolate variant. Ewan ko kung bakit kita ginusto kahit artipisyal ang lasa mo. Fond childhood memory siguro.

Vivaldi: The Four Seasons, Concerto No. 1 in E Major, RV 269 "Spring" | Classical Music

Softee, ikaw naman ang aking inaasam-asam at sana'y sunod na makita at matikman. Actually meron pang isa. Yung candy ng Columbia's na mala-mentos na may iba't ibang kulay at fruit-flavored. Kung tama ang pagkaka-alala ko, mukha ng batang lalake at babae ang larawan sa pakete nito. 

Pinoy Candies and Snacks From 80s to 90s That Are Still Available Today - It's Me Bluedreamer!

Kalai 2007-2008

The entire Philippines, cramped in one photo. Plus Pakistan.

Graduating from high school armed with good academic standing, I thought I'll be having the world at my feet. But then I met this set of brilliant men all eager to make a difference in the world. Boy was I ever humbled. I sure am glad to part of the 2007 freshmen class that got accepted to stay in the Kalayaan Residence Hall, and more so to be part of the basement boys. Despite the newcomer and probinsyano jitters, first year in college was made fun and memorable having them as company. 

"meh..."

the sequoia casts an inescapable shadow

reaching the far side of the world

with all the sun's glory in its favor

ever growing taller, but never ever old

----------------------

"luna luna tu

non mi guardar

luna luna tu

non curiosar

luna luna tu

non far la sentinella"

Mr. Blue Sky - YouTube

I have always been a lock without a key

Guarding an iron clad door

That shuns away the world, and the world from me

Impervious to raging storms, unyielding to scorching heat

Only time can attest how I was perversely free

 

And then you came, the key to my soul!

The hope that was forgotten, forgotten no more!

How your curves and edges perfectly fit the void in my heart

A miracle personified

Divinely handcrafted and signed by God

 

A sudden gush of life flowed through my veins

Senses that were suppressed, you’ve freed from their reins

The door now opened to life’s joys and aches

The first step I’ll brave with your love as my guide

In a world of our own with our hearts intertwined

Might be worth the read

 The hypocrisy of Martin Romualdez - VERA Files